This article is brought to you by the St. Hubert Domestic Violence Ministry. Wish to join this ministry? Our next meeting is February 1 at 7:00 PM in the Bernardin Room, located on the second floor of the Ministry Center. If you can’t make this meeting, but would still like to get involved, please contact the Ministry Coordinator at ministryinfo@sainthubert.org for more information.
 

Myths Concerning Abuse In The Home – PART I

 
Myth: When a couple is having a domestic violence problem, it is just that they have a bad relationship. Often, it's poor communication that is the problem.
 
Fact: Bad relationships do not result in or cause domestic violence. The idea that bad relationships cause violence in the home is one of the most common and dangerous misconceptions about domestic violence. First, it encourages all parties involved - including and especially the survivor - to minimize the seriousness of the problem and focus their energies on "improving the relationship" in the false hope that this will stop the violence. It also allows the batterer to blame the bad relationship and the violence itself on the survivor, rather than acknowledging his/her own responsibility.
 
More importantly, improving the relationship is not likely by itself to end the violence. Violence is learned behavior. Many couples have had bad relationships yet never become physically violent. Many batterers are violent in every one of their relationships, whether they consider them bad or good. The violent individual is the sole source and cause of the violence, and neither his/her partner nor their relationship should be held responsible.
 
Source: http://www.stopabuse.umich.edu/about/myths.html
 
If you or someone you know is being abused, seek help today. In an emergency, please dial 911. For all other help, please call: Illinois Statewide Domestic Violence Helpline 877-TO END DV ( 877-863-6338), 877-863-6339 TTY or call WINGS 24-hour hotline 847-221-5680.